What is one of the biggest turn offs known to man/woman when it comes to finding that special one?
UNEMPLOYMENT.
Everyone, men and women, would like a little bit of security when it comes to being in a relationship. That security does not mean that they want to milk you for all you are worth, but it just means that you can hold your own. Men want a woman who is independent but in the same sense allows him to maintain his masculinity and pay for meals, buy her nice gift etc. Still, a decent man will not object to the fact that every once in a while it would be nice for the lady to pay for a date. This does not mean the man is cheap and ladies please do not see it this way. When a man feels that occasionally the woman should pick up the bill is a PLUS. Yes you heard me right. The man is basically showing you how he does not see you as inferior to him just because you are a woman instead he sees you as an equal in the relationship. This is how it should be. I love being able to occasionally pay for the meal when my love and I go out. Every once in a while a man needs to be treated by his woman as well. Men who feel they are obligated to pay at every date or outing can be showing a small sign of insecurity. They feel that it’s the “man’s job” to come out the pocket. Not really folks. It is no ones “job” nor obligation.
I know that with the economy etc. there are reasons for the rate of unemployed women and men however that is not a legitimate excuse to be unemployed for years to come. There is a difference between an individual who is trying and one who is playing the blame game --- “ Its society’s fault that I am jobless, homeless and unstable” Stay away from those individuals! People who are full of excuses can’t possibly know what it means to be in a true relationship. Every time they are late, every time they lie, every action that is not to your liking will come with an excuse. WASTE OF TIME!
I see too often people making excuses for someone they are dating who have been jobless for years. As I said, I do understand circumstance however before I go jobless I will be out there flipping burgers to keep food on my family’s table and to be able to take my significant other on a nice date. Most importantly, to ensure that my loved one does not feel overwhelmed by the bills and other financial duties. Having a job works out best and being secure in yourself means that you would go find a job and not ever come to think that you are too good for the job being offered. Money is money! I had a girlfriend whose man was turning down every job because he felt he was “qualified” for a higher position. This man turned down every restaurant, bank teller, and mall position because he felt he should have been handed a managerial job right on the spot! Not to mention they had a child to look after and college tuition debt to be paid. My girlfriend was doing it all alone. Of course if I was her I may have had one foot out the door to scare him into taking a position. Or do you feel that love over powers all? Maybe if the case was that the man had just became unemployed and was actually trying to change that circumstance. The issue is, this man has been this way during the whole relationship. It would have been different if he actually came in with a job but on the contrary he was not working the whole four years that they had been together. The financial obligations were hung over the head of my girlfriend from the beginning.
Men you are no different. I know plenty of guys out there who stay with women who have no jobs because they love the way she looks. Big Booty Judies hardly have to work a 9-5. As long as they are pleasing their men and being the fine trophy girlfriend he needs her to be then all is well. Still, after asking some men would they want their girlfriends to work one man replied “Here’s the thing, I do not want a gold digger and if she is not working that means she expects me to pay her bills, get her nails and hair done and trust me I do not mind doing all that for my lady but after a while I may find a Ms. Independent with some ambition and a lot more to offer than a body like buffy. The body fades but that ambition is everlasting. There is nothing like a woman working hard for her own trying to get to the top. I hate women who just want things handed to them. ” Many other men agreed that an ambitious women trying to make it to the top is far more sexier than a jobless big booty Judy. Hmmmm makes you think huh ladies?
The point is you want someone who is trying to do better for them and for the sake of your relationship. Money is not everything and that is not what this blog is insisting; however it is insisting that weight needs to be pulled both ways. Ladies, it does not make you a gold digger to have a qualification that you do not date jobless men. Men, it does not make you a moocher to have a qualification that you do not date jobless women. I do not care who is bringing home more bacon but what I do care about is that I am not bending over backwards working while my man is sitting on the couch eating fruit loops on an annual basis!
The Written Words of AJT
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