Lets rewind
back to approximately two years ago, before any self-evaluation was conducted;
I was the queen of attitude. Without uttering a word, my expressions said
UNAPPROACHABLE. I never thought my attitude was an issue. Of course working
with others was close to impossible, maintaining a relationship past 3 months
was foreign to me, being approached by worthy, head strong, MEN was nothing I
was used to. But I was convinced that I was perfect just the way I was. Ignorance should have been my middle name because
if anyone told me I had an attitude problem I would concur and see it as a
compliment rather than truly seeing it for what it was – A PROBLEM. It was a
problem that was blocking love and most importantly blocking happiness.
I think the
issue that many of us have when it comes to change is we refuse to see the manifestation
of what needs to be altered. Our attitudes are a reflection of our environment.
Your friends, families and surroundings all play a role in who you are. If what
goes on around you is normal to you then you will be conditioned to be the same
way. Thinking my attitude was acceptable was partly because my “inner circle” never detested it. Why? Because they were exactly the same. I felt it was okay to speak like a sailor, disrespect my elders, break
hearts without any care in the world, and to treat others poorly without any
second judgment. I felt this way because those around me enforced it by finding
it humorous and entertaining. It took deep reflection to realize that those in my "inner circle" were not laughing with me they were laughing at me; simply finding
entertainment within my ignorance. I am guilty no doubt about it.
Lets get to
the point of this article now shall we? Your attitude makes you approachable and
can also make you unapproachable. Believe it or not but you can tell a lot about
a person by their facial expressions, their walk, the sureness in their voice
and how they handle emotional situations.
On some
occasions, while at social events, I study those around me. I notice common
“unapproachable” traits in women. Some stand in a corner and never flash a
smile, others' mouths poke out more by the second. Question – How can you
expect a man to come up to you when you reek of negativity? No man wants a
confrontational woman and just by the looks on our faces a man can spot a Ms.
Attitude from a mile away!
The same
goes for men. Your cockiness is not attractive, your confidence is. If a woman
sees you flirting with every girl in the room she will not approach you. You
have “Player” written all over you. A woman reaches a point where she no longer
wants a BOY she needs a man. Someone who looks like a MAN, speaks like a MAN
and approaches her like a MAN. So kill the saggy pants, slang and side way
talking. When you approach a woman treat it like a job interview. Would you use
distasteful words to land a 6-figure salary occupation? So do not use
distasteful words when trying to meet a woman. Better yet – this goes for both
men and women- KILL the sailor mouth. It is not attractive and it is a part of
molding your attitude and maturity. Use different words to describe your
emotions.
When I say
we are cleaning up our attitude that means we are cleaning up our posture, our
speech and our mindsets. Smile folks smile! Make yourself look approachable.
Don’t know if you are an approachable person? How do people act around you at
work? Do they seem timid when it comes to approaching you about a situation?
How do your friends feel about opening up to you? These are small ways that you
can learn about your attitude. How easily you get frustrated is also important.
Find ways to channel your anger and ways to disallow others to have an effect
on your emotions. Your attitude can kill your chance at ever experiencing real
love.
So be
approachable. Be charming. Be an adult. If you were still chasing girls and
boys you would have stopped reading this article a long time ago. We are on the
prowl for men and women. But until you get yourself together they will
never approach you. Stay on this journey with me…
The Written
Words of AJT
No comments:
Post a Comment