I find that one of life’s
biggest threats to relationships is routine. After a while a relationship falls
into repetitiveness: you get up, go to work, get home, make dinner, shower,
watch TV, read etc. and the next day you do it all over again. If you have
children: You get up, get the kids ready, get yourselves ready, make breakfast,
head out the door, come home, get the kids ready for bed, eat dinner and the
next day you find yourself repeating that routine.
Routine can cause your
relationship less communication, less surprises, less romance, less TIME. And
this is why the one thing vital to any relationship MUST be taken advantage of:
vacation!
Every couple needs a vacation away, just the two of them.
No kids, no schedules, no
responsibility, no work, and no obligations: just the two of you together,
alone. When we put “couples” and “vacation” together we immediately think of sexual
intimacy, but to be honest that is not the most rewarding part of vacationing
with your significant other. It is the closeness, the bond and the overall
attraction that makes vacationing worthwhile. It’s as if you are dating again
for the first time. You actually have the opportunity to sit with your partner
and indulge in pleasant conversation without any interruption.
Recently, my partner and I
went on vacation to Spain, Portugal and the Canary Islands. It was a remarkable
experience. However, the scenery and location alone was not its greatest
serenity: It was fulfilling because we took a break from school, work and
everyday obligations. We had the opportunity to really talk to one another
about our individual future plans.
At home we all focus on the usual - getting the bills paid, making sure the house is clean, finishing up
homework, getting ready and prepared for work in the morning, getting the kids to bed etc. We rarely have the time to enjoy the individualism of our relationships. I had the opportunity of sitting with my partner and listening
to his views on multiple subjects to
include family, friends, and his future aspirations. I was getting to know him
all over again. It wasn’t about us. I made
it all about him, an individual whom
I love. Our conversations would last hours and the laughs would be even longer.
Our talks were far
more enhanced during this vacation. Usually when we get home he is tired from
school and I am tired from work. In the evenings we go workout, shower, eat and we have
absolutely no energy left except to hop into bed and sleep. We needed to get
away. We needed to regain our liveliness and most importantly we needed to have
fun and relax together.
The entire vacation I felt
like a high school girl dating and falling in love. Our intimacy was based off more than sexual attraction. It was more of a yearning
to be heard, to be understood and to just relish in the time that we had to
confide in one another on a deeper level.
When we returned home we
brought with us beautiful pictures, once in a lifetime experiences, souvenirs,
great laughs, unforgettable memories but most importantly we brought back an
extreme appreciation for the relationship we share.
A vacation is your way of
rekindling anything that may have been lost during the busy, exhausting days
that life surely brings or to just simply take a break out of life’s “routinal”
character. As a young couple we are in a building stage. We are working towards
building our businesses, getting educated and staying on a fruitful path: Both
college students, overseas, saving money, obtaining our degrees. We are so
motivated and focused on the work we sometimes forget to just stop and
appreciate the moment we have together. I am sure this is not only our story
but others as well.
Life’s responsibilities
should not take away from your love. You owe it to your relationship to always
give back to a love that has given you so much. I am going to make sure my
partner and I vacation at least 2-3 times a year. It has truly been a
breathtaking experiencing and one that I hope you will all surely partake in.
The Written Words of AJT
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