“Nice guys finish last.” We are all familiar with this famous quote and have heard the “nice guys” who repeat it every time they get hurt by a woman or when they cannot seem to grab a woman’s attention. Fact is there are many men who believe “If I just treat her right, like the queen she is, then I am giving her all that she needs. So, why won’t she take heed?” Men- it takes a lot more than being a “nice guy” to get the attention of a woman. Think about the person you are and the type of woman that you hope to attract. Now ask yourself, are the qualities that you look for in a woman, qualities that you inhabit as well? How can you ask for a woman who is driven, confident and motivated but you are not any of those things? You say you want a woman who keeps herself up and has a clean appearance. How can you ask for this type of woman when your friends are begging you to get a haircut! No I am not saying that you are asking for too much. What I am saying is it takes more than being that “nice guy”. If you want to attract a woman that makes up those qualities then you need to change yourself so that those women can be attracted to you. Once you change yourself, your environment including individuals around you will change to that personal alteration in you. That goes for your character, appearance, speech, and personal qualities.
Another reason why women do not give much attention to “nice guys” is a plain, simple, universal fact. A woman needs a man who offers her that one thing. This thing ensures that she does not have to worry about her man and his spending habits, his ability to protect her, his trustworthiness, his honesty and his care and admiration to her. This one thing insures her that she has a stable man. The quality that ties this all together is SECURITY. Sometimes as the nice guy, men tend to forget to use their voice. Be assertive yet respectful and caring. If you have a suggestion to give your woman do not be afraid to give it! Do not be afraid to talk to your woman! Be a man! A woman does not want to be the “man of the house”. Do not get me wrong women love nice men. She loves bragging to her girlfriends about the sweet gestures that her man makes. But she also likes going shopping with her girls knowing what her man would and would not like! A woman loves a nice man but SHE DOES NOT want a PASSIVE man!
Now we come to the big one! The one reason why some nice men have issues getting the woman that they have been eyeing! Nice men tend to be the men who play the “friend” role. Once you have been seen as the “best friend” to a woman you can forget about ever being more. Now some best friends can make it work when the attraction is mutual. But there is one sure way to tell if the attraction is mutual- if a woman calls you up every time she is having troubles with another man then you have reached that friendship type and there is no return. If she is interested in you then she will not talk to you about the men she is currently dating. Nice guys always put themselves in the position to be the best friend. Are there ways to stray away from gaining this BFF relationship? Yes there are. First thing, get some male friends. Show her that you do not spend your time around so many women. When you want to spend time with her give her attention ONE ON ONE. And do not do things with her and her other female friends. Set a date and take her out one on one and show her that you are interested. Do not talk about shopping and her boyfriends, but ask her about the things she enjoys doing. What is she studying? What are her future plans? Show her you’re interested in her. Give her compliments and the one sure thing that will let a woman know you are into her is by telling her “Any guy with the pleasure of dating you is a lucky man.” That is a sure fired line that lets her know that you are interested. Saying things to her and MEANING what you say is important. Do not be afraid to let her know how you feel. More so, let her know your future plans. It is important to show a woman that you have a plan and it’s more important to be able to tell her what you are doing to make those plans happen! Do not be a man who is all talk. But be a man who is about something.
Yes nice guys are a dime a dozen BUT finding a nice guy who is driven and persistent at his future endeavors and taking care of his woman is A CATCH! So be that man! Cut the nice guy act and be more! You are sure to wheel in that woman of your dreams but first check yourself! Make sure the qualities you want are the qualities that you are giving off as well. Nice guys finish last on their own accord! So take control and get that woman of your dreams!
THE WRITTEN WORDS of AJT
3 comments:
Could you write something in regards to women. How can women that are not the full package keep a Good man that is ambitious, kind, assertive when necessary, overall someone who is very blessed and gifted? How can a women keep an all around man when she is up against more qualified women ex. athletic great cooking skills kind religious smart etc? By the way, i love the blog
Or about getting over "the one" even though you knew it wasnt meant to be
Both of your topics are great and Stay tuned because they will be talked about some time next week!!- AJT
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