"ENCOURAGE Your Man Don't Walk On His Dreams"

So I had my mind set on a totally different topic tonight; that is until I ran into a young couple in the Electronics store this evening.

Now, I didn’t mean to ease drop but the boyfriend was saying he wanted to buy a MAC because it would help him create original mixes for his DJ’ing. The girlfriend, and I kid you not, rolls her eyes and says to him, “Seriously? When you gonna give up those childish dreams? You need to get a real job.” She grabs his hand and walks away. By the look on his face, after he realized I heard her flush his dreams down the toilet, he was embarrassed, sad, and discouraged all in one. It made me think; women always ask for “good” men; Men who have ambition and dreams but when those dreams are not pleasing to the woman or seen as “young and naive” she isn’t the first to encourage him but instead she is the first to shoot him down. How can we want better men if we, as their women, are not encouraging them to be better men?

For a woman to change her ways it usually takes heartbreak because she gains understanding that the change must first come from within and in doing so she finds her worth. A woman’s change usually always has something to do with her past heartbreaks, shortcomings of relationships or when she finds a good man she so desperately wants to please. -----

Now let us consider the man. When a man changes it’s usually for one reason – the right woman. The right woman will open his heart to softer possibilities and he will gain a sense of ambition and the will to become a grown man actions and all. He finds himself wanting to give her the world and by any means necessary he will see to it that he provides just that.

A woman who encourages her man makes him greater. She is his other half therefore no matter how crazy society, his friends or his family may feel his ambitions are she is the one right there beside him, holding him down and believing in him. The number one thing that a man needs from his woman is support not her negativity. A man’s pride is more robust than that of a woman therefore when he finds himself in the midst of failure “I told you so” will not motivate him to do more but instead it will discourage him to succeed. He needs the support of the woman he loves and he needs to hear her say, “Try again. Get up and try again because you can do this.” We need to believe in our men and show them just how much we do.

So when I was in the store listening to this young woman down play her man’s dream all I could think was “What is so insecure in this woman that she feels she can kick him down when he was just about to make a step towards his goal?” He wanted to put money towards a reasonable resource to start his journey. If I were the girlfriend what would I do? I would have took out my credit card and bought the computer for him. Why? Because that is support. It’s saying, “If I don’t care about your dream as much as you do, then I care about it more.”

Sometimes the actions of women with good men disgust me. Women want so bad to experience true love and when they find it they do the most idiotic things imaginable and end up losing it. It is not always the man who messes up. Women are so used to the bad men that when a good one comes along they have no idea what to do with him. Just as you gave your love to the man who treated you like dirt, you need to give your love to the man who is willing to strive to give you the world. Just like you supported the man who was illegally making money you need to support the man who is legit and making his dreams a reality.

Women- you make the good men. A woman’s love is enough to change a man; to mature him, to encourage him and to get him to his greatest achievements. So ladies be that woman who when your man is at his highest pedestal he says, “I could have never done it without the support of my beautiful, encouraging lady.” Be that woman. Don’t be the woman to shut him down but instead be the woman who keeps him lifted.

The written words of AJT